On Coming Home

So, I've come to a few conclusions since I came home two weeks ago..... nothing too revolutionary, but things of which I was never really aware. Either going to ND caused the world to slow down or I've gotten more observant (or at least I think I have). Now, the driving force behind actually writing this post is because my mom has jokingly said to me several times since I've been home, "I feel like I don't know you anymore!" The comment, made in jest with a exaggerated tone, actually rings true for most graduates living away from home once they return to the nest.

First, people's lives are generally more f'in boring than they attempt to make it seem, so don't be jealous of what other people are doing, but more concerned about how to make your life more interesting. I came to this realization while zoning out during the homily at Sunday Mass yesterday morning (sorry Jesus, it happens). I initially began pondering this tangent once I listened more closely to what people were saying throughout Mass, which leads to another rant. Just like Vatican II did, the Catholic Church really needs to revamp how they do Mass because frankly, this gig is old. If you listen, half the people in Church really have no idea what they're saying or responding, or why, or how it originated, or what the ramifications are spiritually (as it may be with other religions, but I don't know), and the other half claim to know what's going on (of which about 20% of people probably do). People respond in church as they do listening to their favorite songs, they don't even think about it anymore. The next time you're in Mass (if you ever are) actually listen for it, and by it I mean nothing extraordinary, but that's exactly the point. Maybe I'm off-base since I'm judging on a relatively older upstate New York crowd, but then again I don't care. Empty words folks, empty words, which brings me back to my point about most people being f'in boring so don't feel bad....

So the only difference between some people I know from when I saw them last May and this May is that they are a year older, so be glad you accomplished a lot over the last twelve months. I mean, seriously, so when I ask you "What's new?" the only thing that you can tell me is that you're doing well? Honestly, boring people? If someone asked me, I would enlighten them that I graduated, my cat died, and I was a member of the Blue Man Group for two nights, among other things. Now I'm not claiming to be the King of All Things Kool, but whenever you think you've had a boring day since you've been home, I can name you five additional people that had a more boring WEEK than you.

However, speaking of a personal FML moment, the other day after dinner my brother went to grab some animal crackers, and so did I, and so did my mom and dad. We then spontaneously broke into song and animal noises, re-enacting the opening scene from the Lion King using the crackers. I was the antelopes and elephants. FML.

In actuality, however, I have enjoyed the single unemployed life. Luckily, 90% of the conversations in my house are completely sarcastic (surprising, I know) so I haven't minded being home. I have already gotten lectured, however, that I cannot touch my parent's collection of fine liquors that they have in a cabinet about which I completely forgot. Hell, they haven't touched them since 1984 anyway, so would they notice? Then again I haven't partaked in any alcohol since being home, lowering my tolerance faster than a celebrity's IQ, but in the long run that is probably a good thing. The week after getting home acted as virtual detox, and I felt my body slipping into nirvana. My parental units tried to make me go to rehab, but I said no, no no.....

Other random moments of amusement have resulted from my mom knowing the words to Disco Stick and Boom Boom Pow before I had heard the songs, as well as going to my first spin cycle class at the gym sandwiched in between my parents. When my family walks into the gym together and check in as a line of people, I feel like the von Trapps and that we should break out in song. Oh wait, we did that to Lion King last week.